Monthly Archives: August 2010

Man-Hattan Musings

To be male in Man-Hattan is uber-exquisite. It’s a testosterone-tinged town teeming with tweeters, tweakers and twisted dreamers. Men from all over the world pounce on the city rabid for more—more sex, food, power, fashion. And we find it. Each month, I’ll share some of the best I’ve tumbled upon. With New York Fall Fashion Week fast approaching, let me share a few final late summer musts.

August into September is Manhattan’s most sensual time. The heat peaks and the flesh quotient soars. My favorite people-watching perch is at The Roasting Plant at Greenwich and 7th Avenue in the West Village. The coffee is amazing—they roast the
beans and brew it cup by cup—but the front of store street runway bench is the real draw. Within a half hour you’ll see leggy teen girl fashion models, city celebs (John Cameron Mitchell, Phillip Seymour Hoffman at my last stop) and Chelsea boys with bodies as
hard as my Mastercard. Speaking of stunning physiques: take a peek at the door boys at California style hut, Hollister at Houston and Broadway. Yummy.

Grab a martini at the Metropolitan Museum’s Roof Garden on a Friday night. Chic view, fun crowd, classic Man-Hattan and the rooftop’s Big Bambu installation by Mike and Doug Starn is up until October. And quite a few eligible bachelors if you’re hunting, ladies. Also, the film series at the Bryant Park outdoor cinema may have ended but September weather is still fine for taking an outdoor yoga class or listening to some piano concerts. Hint: skip the maddening crowd on the Bryant Park lawn. Sit at one of the chic little tables on the raised area behind and eavesdrop as film industry regulars hang and chat. You might score an agent for that screenplay you wrote. Plus, make sure to upload the song of the summer into Fall (sorry Katie Perry and Kelis) Kylie Minogue’s ‘All the Lovers’, the Wawa Mmb anthem remix. I discovered the song while swimming in a sea of men at the Boat Slip tea dance in Provincetown July 4.

Finally, what really electrifies me about this city, is the melting pot mix of fabulous urbanites. Spotted this month at the fountain in front of the delectable Time Warner Mall: A gaggle of gorgeous gal cougars, heeled and hip, on their way to Bergdorf Goodman, were stopped momentarily by a group of young boys from the Bronx who were dipping into the fountain, one of them momentarily nude.

“Look at me lady” he screamed. And they did.

See you next month when I’ll report on Fashion’s Night Out, Sept. 10

Court Artisan: Scott Alexander Hess

1 Comment

Filed under Events and Situations

Little Mishaps to Grand Entrances

Little mishaps can remind us of what is strongest inside.

I was on my way to the Carlyle Hotel where I was to be photographed for an article by Lynn Yaeger for The New York Times about women, like myself, who have their own distinct style and how we came to it.

As I walked up Madison Ave., I felt the tear. The snap of the collar of my cheongsam had come undone; with it, my equilibrium, well-being and serenity.  “What an inconvenient time!” “Now what?” I knew that I had to have the snap repaired – immediately. I knew that if I didn’t the imperfection would tear away at me, and that my time at the Carlyle would be totally ruined. I needed a tailor and I needed one now.  I had a grand total of 20 minutes.

I quickly assessed the situation. The Ralph Lauren store was a few blocks away and I knew they had tailors on the premises. With determination and resolve, I quickly made my way up to the store, found my favorite sales associate, Michael and within minutes one of the tailors was sewing my snap. I relaxed into the ease and familiarity of allowing him to do his work. Ten minutes later, and right on time, I entered the Carlyle, totally restored and bursting with confidence.  I was whole again.

Therein is the key to my strong distinct style. My father, Itzhak Izidore Salamon was a tailor; my mother, Ida Dina Berner was a seamstress. They made all my clothes.  I grew up surrounded by the richness and color of cloth and design and I adored getting dressed.

And from day one I was the best dressed girl in town.  Fast forward to today when I still adore getting dressed. Nothing thrills me more than opening up my closets and feasting my eyes on my huge collection of amazing antique clothes – Victorian, Edwardian, 20’s and ethnic Chinese, Japanese and Persian.  It is this connection to beautiful, one-of-a-kind clothes and tailors and dressmakers that keeps me rooted and reminds me of my origins and roots and the fabric of my being.

Court Artisan: Tziporah Salamon

1 Comment

Filed under Courting Soul Style...Deception, inception, inspiration for the simple sophisticate seeking Soul.

NYC Style Pilgrims: Brian and Richard

COMMiti ego Questionnaire for Creative Teams:

Brian Bennett and Richard Ives

Pilgrims. Handy Pioneers make the best go-to visionaries and this week’s Creative Team, Richard Ives and Brian Bennett of New York’s “Pilgrim” answer the blare of a shofar calling in the style hounds and devoted for a cornicopia of style. (It’s Fall Harvest time…Rosh Hoshana and Thanksgiving is coming…we just had to go there!)

The store is called Pilgrim on the historic Lower East Side, Garmento block of Orchard Street in New York City and the style creds are vast. Richard has been a stylist, art director and designer for the likes of Richard Avedon, Steven Klein, Michael Thompson, and Donna Karan and partner, Brian Bennett, a connoisseur and collector of art and music for most of his life.

Love and passion for the arts and style equals Pilgram, located at 70 Orchard Street in Manhattan. Dive into Richard Ives’ custom collection plus vintage designer runway styles and bijoux from Valentino, Christian LaCroix, Dior, Fendi, KJL Studio, Wendy Gell, JMP Paris, YSL, Ugo Correani, Versace, Givenchy, Oscar de la Renta, Ben Amun, Miriam Haskell, Napier, Ciner, Kramer, Lisner, Guy LaRoche, Claude Montana, Chanel, Dior, Alaia, Krizia and Sonia Rykiel. Here is a link to the lively and active Pilgrim Facebook page and here is what makes them tick as Creative Partners.

1. how do you access your creative?

Brian: I try to meditate daily, I try to do creative thinking during my morning walk with my dogs — which is every morning.

Richard: I don’t even think about it, just a part of my thought mechanism. it’s not like I sit down and say to myself: “be creative now”. lol. It’s like someone who is good at math or basketball, it just happens.

2. how do you transform fear and disdain into brilliance + partnership + productivity?

Brian: I think creative things often come from a place of fear which is kind of a paradox as I try not to live in fear and try to live in the present.  I don’t think that makes much sense, but creative brilliance often comes for tapping into searching for one’s sense of self.

Richard:. The fear is of being”found out,” that you really aren’t talented and you have to stay one step ahead of everyone so they don’t discover this. lol. It keeps me motivated.

3. what have you realized about yourself as a result of creative partnerships?

Brian: I’ve been in creative partnerships my whole adult life.  I can’t imagine doing it alone.  I don’t think great things come from doing it on your own.  Everything that is magnificent is always a collaboration, but it’s never easy–negotiating your ideas vs. their ideas–there is often conflict, and conflict resolution is not easy until you reach the resolution.

Richard: I’m a control freak, but I still need input and ideas and critique in order to grow and produce.

Brian and Richard’s collaborative creative / partnership ritual.

Brian: Richard usually buys the fabrics before anything. Richard then usually asks my opinion about what I think.  Usually he has an idea right off the bat — that is usually great.  I sometimes offer my advice about changing it here or there, or what dress, top or pant it should be done with.  We often talk about what’s going on every day in the world of fashion, design, music, the news, everything is an influence. Even the subway ride over to work.  Sometimes I’ll see something that I’ll share that I loved someone’s look on the subway.  It just evolves from there into long conversations…LOL.

Richard: As Brian stated, fabric selection is a major factor in our collaboration. I pick something and then we discuss the possibilities or the limitations. It has become our design ritual.

Court Artisan: Jade Dressler

Leave a comment

Filed under Courting Soul Style...Deception, inception, inspiration for the simple sophisticate seeking Soul.

And the role of housewife will be played by…

Today I am playing a housewife.

I’m trying it on. Yesterday I harvested organic vegetables at the farm where there’s a share included in my August rental in Sag Harbor. Today, I gathered towels and sheets and miscellaneous linens in a laundry basket, nestling the plastic latticework into my side as I scooped up the textile remains of weekend guests. I lovingly rinsed every lettuce leaf I had pulled from the ground at the farm. I watched the very same dirt I rinsed off my toes go down the drain as it freed the fresh greens from their earthen coat. I arranged fresh flowers cut from the rows of cosmos, black-eyed susans, and sunflowers that punctuate the potato furrows and lines of tomato vines at the farm. As I found a place for our abundant harvest in our overstuffed refrigerator I reveled in the continuity of handpicking the very same food that’s sustaining my summer energy. I organized the Tupperware, matching long-separated pairs to their beloved other halves. I took great satisfaction in fitting a few more glasses into the dishwasher after some purposeful rearranging.

I’m finding that I’m a gifted domestic goddess, even if I may never figure out how to fold a fitted sheet into anything more than a clumsy heap. And the joy in trying this role on for comes from the fact that it is simply that: a role—one among a multitude from which I can choose on a daily basis. I am so blessed to live in a time and place in which options abound and choice is as taken for granted as breathing. (I have consciously created my personal and business life to allow for maximum freedom.) And for the fact that I can choose to don a little apron and dishwashing gloves and cook dinner every night, or simply hire a cleaning service and order out, I am eternally grateful. Because though the label “domestic goddess” suits me quite well, the joy in it comes from the fact that I get to choose it today, whether or not I choose it again tomorrow.

Court Artisan: Kate Northrup

1 Comment

Filed under Ecstatic Pleasure Sensations...Finding the marvelous in the mundane for meaning in a minute.

Boost Your Body from Inside, Then Get Dressed!

The most beautiful clothes in the world eventually come off in the places where we can be most free. How can you be happy in your perfect fit Birthday Suit?

In my first Q and A for Hearst’s, The Dame Lays it Down…


I have a hard time enjoying sex because I’m so worried about what my body looks like. What can I do to feel less self-conscious?

My number one antidote is to tap into your “turn on” and get to self-pleasuring. Start with a full-length mirror to view your body, crank up some hot dance music, and tell your reflection what a total hottie she is (seriously, do it!)

Read the rest of my answer here. And comment.comment, comment. Show Hearst some of that Dame Lori love!

or see the lively discussion that popped up when Yahoo’s Shine picked up my answer here:

Shine on Sisters!

Leave a comment

Filed under Holy Health Habits...How outrageous is your well being?, Uncategorized

james mathers artist. ritualized

This week, The Ritualizer astral travels and grounds in the rituals that are the essence of artist and philosopher, James Mathers.

James is the real deal, an articulate, sensitive, differentiated independent and realized creative, mastered in many mediums. He continues to playfully enjoy counter culture and petri dish commercialism.  He is both misunderstood and enjoyed by many.

I first met James about a year before his first one man show in New York, a full page ‘non paid’ profile in Warhol’s Interview Magazine which was followed up by the famous ‘Roses Lime Juice’ ad. ((google it))

Here is a tasting of some of rituals that James shared with me:


Well,  wherever I am when I wake up, which could be anywhere, I look for something broken or chipped or cracked or incomplete because that’s a sign.

Then I find my gratitude.


For me the challenge is to stay in my body and not out of it so my travel ritual is to sense and feel my feet or one foot.

Children seem to do this instinctively, so with practice – observation and many crayons to paper, this ritual is now illustrated with suggested directive guidance in my book so anyone of any age can practice this ritual.


Always happens when making contact and connection while putting the crayon to paper.
This takes me back to when I was a kid and did this very complicated drawing of a boat.
My mother put the picture of the boat on the refrigerator and I was instantly famous. This was my first taste of notoriety and I’ve had a crayon in my pocket ever since.


My nature ritual involves running water, whether it’s a river, stream or non specific muck running down the sewer.
First, I go to the downside, I speak to the spirit, and say thank you for everything I have ever lost from my teeth, my art, my love, my time, my youth and then I go to the upstream side of the stream and I say thank you for everything that is coming and welcome, often the same things that I have lost in addition to a few wonderful surprises that may come and my own inevitable annihilation.

This way I feel myself as a window or a membrane and this to me feels very empowering.


My giving ritual is that when I give, I immediately forget that I have given anything to anybody and loose track utterly of that account. Therefore, my giving ritual is also my forgetting ritual.

Court Artisan Tip: Perhaps you may already astral travel and not know that, this is what you are/have been doing. James’s graphic novel will provide step by step directives that are supported with clear and playfull illustrations. Expect some adventure, discovery and welcome the un-ravel to access big mind and your higher self by way of astral travel.


Rx: Ritualizer.

A Peek into the private and public rituals of extraordinary ordinary people.

Like Proust’s questionnaire, “The Ritualizer Nine” are nine questions put to extraordinary ordinary people to reveal our habits, pleasures, pathologies and silliness as insight to character, connections to each other and human evolution itself.

Access The shine. Access the Love. Prescription: Ritualizer

Court Artisan: Kelly Lebwith

1 Comment

Filed under Spiritual Solvents...In our quest for higher conscious, what sticks to the ribs and heart.

Newbie Seductresses: is Loving The Dame

What if you are new to this whole seduction game and nervous…what advice is there for Newbie Seductresses?

Writer Melissa Chapman asked just that recently of Dame Lori for the site

The best kind of seductress is the newbie,” says Dame Lori, a pleasure expert who has studied with the world’s experts and worked with thousands of men and women, teaching them to express themselves with sex and seduction. “Newbie seductresses possess the innocence of a newborn learning to walk and how adorable is that? You can’t help but giggle at the stumbles, the fumbles, the grasping and oh, yeah, the falls!

According to Dame Lori, the more you approve of and enjoy that shy, virginal, vulnerable, blushing and terrified part of you… the hotter, sexier, cuter and more precious you will be to your man.

“I am not a fan of ‘getting over’ anything in life, I have found it to be more pleasurable when I am in agreement with my shyness and embarrassment,” says Dame Lori. “Celebrate your adorable shyness and the awkwardness of blushing. It will lead the way to having more fun.”

Dame Lori also notes that although seduction is always seen as doing something sexual or naughty, for the most part during the day, it is neither. In fact Dame Lori says she uses it as a serious communication tool all day long  to engage with others.

and just what are these tips?

for more see the whole thing, click here:

1 Comment

Filed under Ecstatic Pleasure Sensations...Finding the marvelous in the mundane for meaning in a minute.